If you want a bank you can contact, here we are. We can talk to you, give you money, take your money and do other stuff. We even have a poetry department who will write you poetry as and when you are feeling low.
**Note, AI on occasions may be used for poetry generation.
We are regulated by OFCOM and the FDA.
Charlie Meln, our Chief Officer, simply detests technology. Charlie is quoted as saying - I am never happier than with an Abacus, a pencil, paper and haggis sandwich. He believes laughter is key to a positive financial journey - he loves to say he is 'laughing all the way to his bank!'
Cella toes the line and as Charlie says 'no such thing as 'HR'. The bank is being transparent and calling Personnel, personnel, just like the good old days. Cella states - we only employ good looking people - as we want you to want to come and see us - and stare in wonder at our well groomed loveliness. We are lovely!
Selia Merne, BA, MA, gone to many universities etc etc - is our creative writing and poetry specialist. Not only does she write reports but she also looks to furnish each customer with a poem to cheer them up. When she is not writing she is generally reading. Selia is quoted as saying - 'I read and write...it's...what I do'.
Mainframes, AI and Quantum are the way to go - especially if you could fit them on a Raspberry Pi - Nvidia are you listening? I personally still like my TN3270 console running on Windows 7 - sooo nice! I'm doing this because I am happy to take responsbility for all your transactions. :) - Whether CICS or ATM.